Abeo
by DelorisPea
Summary: Knowledge of what is possible is the beginning of happiness - George Santayana


This is my darkfest fic.

Prompt: Petunia knows what she does is wrong. she shouldn't shove her nephew in cupboards or keep him from going to school but she doesn't want him to die like Lily so she keeps him hidden and close to her all the time.

Warnings: Mentions of abuse, both spouse and child.

AN: Thank you to the mods who put up with the fact I'm an absolute idiot with horrible time keeping as of late and thank you to my Beta, A, who stepped up last minute to fill the place of my equally idiotic normal beta (I love her really). This was planned to be longer, more detailed, but it wanted to stay short. It also was planned to be a lot different than it turned out. The title is Latin for changes. Enjoy

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If someone were to do a short interview with the people on Privet Drive about where they lived, Petunia Dursley would no doubt be the most mentioned name. A model citizen, with the white picket fence, the perfect husband that she looked after and a charming son. They thought she had it all, but looks can be very deceiving.

–

When Petunia and Lily were growing up, they had a babysitter named Elizabeth Nally. She had the most angelic face, with blonde hair that always seemed to be shiny and perfect, no matter how bad the weather. Her parents were pillars of society. The Mother, Amy, a school teacher, and the Father, Adam, a clergyman. Elizabeth was expected to be an angel, and she played the part well. She spent at least one day a week at the Evan's household; always on a Friday or Saturday night.

At first she had simply put the girls to bed and then watched television, but within a month there was a new routine. Once Petunia and Lily were in bed, there was a knock on the door and a boy would come in. Every night there was a new boy, and every night they could hear the moans that came from downstairs. The shouts to the deity's and the curse words they weren't allowed to say.

One night Petunia wanted to know what the big deal was. She was old enough to start noticing boys, like Mike in her class at school who was just the cutest thing she had ever seen, but she hadn't quite got to the bit where she spent time with them.

She crept down the stairs, carefully avoiding the step that always creaked, and walked up to the doo. She peeked through, being careful once more to avoid moving it. It didn't take long before she heard moans and saw the reason for them. Elizabeth and her flavour of the night weren't wearing much in the way of clothing. Petunia could make out a pile on the floor with two pairs of jeans and a male shirt. Elizabeth's blonde hair was hanging over the end of the sofa and she could see two pairs of feet at the other end. It was all hands and saliva yet they seemed to be enjoying it. She must have been standing there for twenty minutes before Elizabeth threw her head back with a final shout and shuddered. The boy on top of her did the same and they shared a final kiss before he got off her, getting dressed quickly.

Petunia had run back up to her room as quick as possible and dreamed of Mike and her doing that one day.

–

Petunia never did get to date Mike. He ended up going out with Sally, her best friend, and then every other girl in the class. By the time he got to her, she was bored of him. iBored/i. That was her excuse. Every time a guy made an advance on her, she would call them boring. She had no time for men in school, preferring to hang out with her girlfriends on the weekend.

Lily and she never really got on, but they were sisters; meaning the attempt was made to spend time together while Lily was home from her 'special school'. Lily never bored Petunia, though that could be to the fact that neither of them had much to say to the other.

–

It was late August and Lily had to go back to school in a few days. Their parents were out and both of them were sat in the living room when they decided they both wanted to check out a pub nearby. Petunia was 18. Lily was younger, not old enough to get in yet legally, but her smile was charming and she was the one in the family that was blessed in the looks department.

They had no problem with the bouncers, Lily flounced in like she owned the place, Petunia followed behind her with a disapproving look. She had expected another boring night, but as she got to the bar, someone had bumped into her side.

Petunia will admit at a later date, that she should have iknown/i from the first meeting, but at the time she was young and foolish. Vernon had taken one look at her before his sneer had turned lecherous. He was unlike anyone she had ever seen, and after she left the bar that night, they were inseparable.

Petunia had never had any type of relationship with a man before, so when they first had sex, she had expected to shout, moan and shudder just like Elizabeth. As she lay there after, shaking on the bed while Vernon showered, she couldn't help but wonder why anyone would want to put themselves through so much pain. It wasn't brilliant, it wasn't even good. It had hurt, he was rough and he smelt. Yet over time she couldn't let him go. He owned her and she knew it.

It wasn't a good relationship, but when he told her they were going to get married, she had gone along with it. She had told him about Lily, about her special little sister. He had sneered and told her she was better off without her. His words had hurt, but she agreed with him, and by the time she got married and Lily hadn't come, she agreed with him more.

Her son, Dudley, was born not long after. As she sat in the hospital bed with tears streaming down her face and crying from the pain, she wished for Lily. She would know exactly what to do, exactly what to say. Instead she had Vernon telling her to be quiet and to stop disturbing him while he read his Sunday paper. The nurses had given her looks of sympathy and she had turned her head in shame.

The pain of childbirth was greater than she imagined, but the pain of the bruises on her chest or the bite marks all over her inner thighs made it look like a blessing. She knew at the end of this she would have a beautiful baby boy. She knew no end to her other suffering.

–

It had been a normal night when she had heard the knock at the door. She had removed her apron, pasting a smile on her face as she walked to answer it. She had heard the soft snores of her baby boy in his room upstairs from the baby monitor sitting on the hallway table, and the blast of the television with the late night news from the living room that Vernon always watched.

She had opened the door, ready to greet whoever was on the other side, but found only a small basket. Its contents: a blue blanket wrapped around a sleeping infant. She doesn't remember much after that. It was a blur of activity, as she gasped so loud it brought her husband out of his hole to check on her.

They had read the note, a vicious smile on Vernon's face. Petunia had gone to check on Dudley to hide her tears. Her beautiful, happy sister was dead and downstairs was the thing she loved most in this world. She had to look after him.

Vernon had started shouting almost immediately as she returned to the kitchen. He didn't want the baby in their house, and Petunia agreed. Such a precious little baby could not be in this house of anger.

It wasn't until they had nearly reached their nearby church that she had remembered the note. iBlood protection/i. She didn't understand how magic worked and she didn't understand how she could protect this baby by just having it in her house, but at that moment she knew it needed to stay.

It was the very first time Vernon had ever agreed to something, but she had paid the price. She paid it every night for weeks as she lay there while Vernon abused her.

–

The years passed and she watched him grow. Harry was much smaller than Dudley but he always had enough food, she made sure of it. She let him cook, and while he looked at her with sad eyes every time he wasn't allowed to join them at the dinner table, she thanked the heavens that Vernon never noticed him stealing the leftovers or eating the ingredients. If the boy didn't steal while he cooked and cleaned, he would have never ate properly.

There were days when he came home from school and Petunia had to leave the room to hide her tears. His glasses broken, black eyes and cuts on his knees. Dudley would laugh, and shove by him as he went towards his room, only to complain the next day when as Harry was 'allowed' to stay home from school; made to stay locked in his cupboard.

iThe cupboard/i. To the outside world it may look like a prison, but to Petunia it was a haven. Harry was safe there. Vernon couldn't touch him and as long as he stayed in there, he wouldn't get hurt.

–

Petunia was content with life. She had a son who she adored, a husband that was quickly becoming bored of her and more interested in his secretary and then she had Harry, sweet little Harry. He reminded her of the pictures of James she had once seen, but he also had her sisters smile. She could never lose that smile.

She knew the day would come when Harry would get his letter, but what she wasn't prepared for was the fear that gripped her. Harry, this small child, was going to leave her. He was going to that school. Hogwarts, they called it. He was going into the world that killed her beautiful sister.

She'd done everything she could to stop him from finding those letters. She sided with her husband as they fled their home. Hiding him from his eventual death at the hand of magic. She knew she lost though when he came to collect him. They had no way to stop that beast from taking Harry; although as she watched him fly away, his smile broke her heart and she wished him all the best.


End file.
